Monday, July 21, 2008

Old school baby!

Last year while in Chicago, my mom showed me an entire closet filled with my old journals. They dated back to when I was an 8 year old little person. I actually filled one entire duffle bag with some of the journals and flew back home to San Diego with them. They are truly hilarious, heartbreaking, and stupidly dramatic, all at the same time. I have read through most of them and hate and love the awkward teen me. For your viewing pleasure here is one dating back to 1993:


There is not a single hot guy in the freshman class. They are all ugly. Homecoming is coming up and the prospects of me actually going have severely diminished due to:

A. the massive cold sore on my bottom lip

B. The fact that somehow I have magically become a loser.

C. The fact that the two boys whom have showed an interest in going with me are both huge losers.

So..Gerky wants to ask me to Homecoming. I can tell because he talks about the dance over and over to me. I almost want to punch him in the face and scream, “You have humongous teeth and a bad hair cut and you smell like BBQ chips. Hello! Clearly I am way to cool for you!” Part of me, a small part, is nice enough not to do that. He almost asked me yesterday in Spanish class. He got all sweaty and tongue tied and the bell rang. I rushed out quick before he could ask me. I will need to find some sort of date for this thing before Gerky asks me and my fate as a humongous loser becomes officially sealed at this god forsaken school.

Speaking of ugly guys I have never seen so many in one place at one time. It’s as if all the Catholics in the greater Chicago land area that were breeding boys in 1979 and 78 were terribly ugly people. Now there are hoards of pimply faced ugly boys roaming the halls of this school. The juniors and seniors are hot though. Unfortunately they are all too mesmerized my sisters humongous boobs to notice little loner kid me. Have I mentioned how much Nazareth academy sucks ass yet? This is all my sisters fault. She is the one who came up with the ridiculous idea of planning for her college career at the tender age of 14 by attending private school. Who does that? Aren’t we supposed to be young and carefree? She is an idiot. Hopefully an idiot that one day will have loads of money thanks to all of her idiot planning. Have I mentioned that my sister has single handedly ruined my life?


archshrk said...

I love it! I could totally picture us chatting in the halls and you going off about how ugly all the freshman boys are. Hilarious! I wish I could find some of my old journals. Hum...where did my diary go?


Siobhan said...

Old journals are the best aren't they!?