Best Christmas Present Ever

My kids have lice. Not all three of them, basically just Amelia. However I did find eggs in Jake and Andrew's hair. So gross. We received an e-mail from our principal a few days ago stating that lice was circulating around the school. I didn't freak out. I should've.

Today I spotted a big one crawling around in Amelia's hair. I immediately set out for the drug store to buy some lice shampoo. I have spent the day shampooing the kid’s hair, combing out little eggs from their scalps, washing sheets, pillows, sofa covers, and vacuuming and shampooing the holy shit out of our carpets.

While I was combing the little nits out of Amelia's hair she was screaming her head off as if I were attempting to murder her. That girl has a severe bug phobia. I don’t blame her. It's disgusting.

It's just one thing after another around here.

Wishlist for my Kids

Coat-Anthropologie kids, Shirt-Crew cuts, Other shirt-Etsy

Boo

Last night our house was booed.

It was around 8pm when we heard a loud thud at the door.  It startled us. I thought it sounded like the thud of a Jehovahs Witness attempting to spread their good news. Aaron believed it might be a needy knock coming from someone that was bleeding out on our doorstep desperately searching for a ride to the hospital. We tend to jump to conclusions.

When Aaron opened the door we were relieved to find a large basket filled with Halloween candy and crafts on our welcome matt. Buried inside were instructions on how to continue the boo cycle. We were to place a sign on our door stating that we had already been booed. Within the following two days we had to boo two other families.

Tonight we set out to boo the neighbors. Jacob had a Grim Reaper mask on as a spooky disguise. Amelia wore her fastest tennis shoes. Andrew, of course, stayed home because booing is beneath him. I told him he was boring.  He shrugged his shoulders while retrieving a popsicle from the freezer before heading back downstairs to his man cave to finish reading What is the What for the 2nd time. 

We hit Brielle and Alexander’s house first. Jacob pounded on the door and we all took off running. Amelia tripped over her own feet and laughed so hard that she peed her pants. wehad to make a pit stop at home so she could change.  Next we hit up Anna and Olivia’s house. Our cover was blown when we ran across the street back home and the kids slammed the door loudly behind us.

A few hours later we heard the sound of laughter and running legs outside. Some neighbor kids stopped at our door saw our sign and continued on to Anna’s. I could hear Olivia shout out “Mom! We got booed AGAIN!” followed by the screeching tires of a minivan fleeing the scene.

And that is why I absolutely adore our neighborhood!

You can download this boo sign here in case you want to start it up in your hood:

August so far

In August

Amelia lost her two front teeth.  She is growing up so very, very fast

Jacob joined cub scouts

who said cub scouts was for dorks--not these two!

The boys graduated from their second year of Junior lifeguards

Andrew grew like a foot and half.  He has decided to be all angsty and moody 24/7.  It cracks me up because I remember being exactly the same way at 13.  Hello puberty!

At the Pocket, Ocean Beach: California

I took the kids to the beach yesterday for what to me felt like thirty minutes. After dusting the sand off their feet and piling all our ocean going gear into the back of my truck I noticed that my clock read 2pm. We were there for three hours! That’s what ocean Beach does to people—distorts time.


Pocket beach is my favorite local beach because it’s beautiful but more importantly it’s always empty. However, the few people we do share the beach with are always unique. For instance there was a woman frolicking in the water that appeared to be wearing an adult diaper inside her bikini bottom. Behind where our beach towel was laid out, a man in moon boots had a hoodie zipped over his face and was sound asleep. Also I may or may not have witnessed a teenage drug exchange. But hey, that’s the price we have to pay for the luxury of hanging out at a nearly deserted, beautiful beach.

The Best Quotes Ever

I really need to start writing down the funny stuff my kids say. I'm going to attempt to write a weekly blog post entirely on funny kid quotes

Andrew:

Tonight while helping Andrew prepare for a History test I asked him "What did the Inca emperor expect out of his citizens?" To which Andrew replied "That they all get circumcised?"

Wow! I'm afraid to ask where he came up with that answer. Luckily for the Incas they were not all expected to be circumcised.

Amelia:

"Mommy, if you ever are having a dream you don't like you can just control it. That's what I do. If my dreams are boring or scary I change them to whatever I want."

It must be nice to wield that much power

Jacob:

"Mom can you buy those butt wipe things that aren't for babies. I think they're for old people. It's like old people toilet paper. They're awesome. You can even flush them.

Spoken like a true Braun.

They're Growing Up

Today was a Good Day

Today was one of those days where the very idea of being indoors, even for one minute, drove me crazy. I barely managed to hold it together during our hour long church service this morning. Jacob was scheduled to sing along with all the kids from his school in grades 1st through 4th.

While up in front of the congregation crammed with perfumed and khaki wearing parents, bored elderly folk, and the innocent eyes of the ever so pure Lutherans, my son proceeded to persistently poke the ribs of the petite boy standing in front of him. For some odd reason he believed that the rest of the church would not notice what he was doing. My kids never cease to embarrass me. Much to Jake's dismay, I made him not only apologize to the kid, but his parents as well.

But all of this is off topic, what I really wanted to talk about is how beautiful San Diego has been lately.

We've had rain. Not the fake California ran where it drizzles a tiny bit and people go crazy, frantically pulling out umbrellas and rain boots from their attic storages because they fear a tiny drop of water will melt them. The rain we had last week was a down pour. We had thunder and even more impressively--lighting! This was the first time I had seen lighting in my 12 years living here. It was awesome.

Our week of rain ended triumphantly with the most stunning rainbow I have ever seen. It appeared at dusk and the lady across the alley politely knocked on my door to alert me to the beauty I was missing out on.  My neighbors and I gathered outside and stared up at the sky as if tiny white winged angels were circling above. Rain, lightening, and rainbows are miraculous for S.D.

Quickly following all that rain everything turned green. Nearby Mission Trails with its desert like terrain is almost as vivid as Ireland.

Today was a sunshine day. I was super antsy around the house. Aaron took Jake to La Jolla for an intense swim at 6am this morning. As a result they were wiped out afterward. Aaron was lounging around the house lazily watching TV and dozing off on the living room coach. I took the littles out for a bike ride around the hood and finally convinced Aaron to take a beach trip with us. Grudgingly he gave in.  We headed to my favorite spot, Ocean Beach. The following are the pictures from today:

I like how Jake basically melts into the rocks. 

Random adorable red-headed couple who I thought matched the sunset so I took their photo

Apple picking in Julian

A day in our lives

I fall in love with places so easily that I am certain if it weren't for the stability of Aaron I would move, at the very least, twice a year. I love moving. I love purging my home of unneeded things and packing everything neatly into boxes. I like the idea of starting over and reinventing what our idea of normalcy is.

During the one hour drive to Julian this afternoon, I convinced myself that we needed to pack up and move to Poway, a slightly rural community in the boonies of San Diego. Within ten minutes we were in Ramona. The charming dirt roads, mail boxes lining their quaint streets, and the adorable old fashioned shops had me rethinking Poway.

Finally we arrived in Julian, rich with the smell of autumn and brimming with denim and cowboy boots. The layers of mountains that frame Julian's horizon took the breath right out of me.

"I love it here,” Andrew announced.

He is a mini-me. Andrew tends to voice exactly how I feel at any given moment. The two of us are so very much alike that I worry for the little guy. Every failure of his echoes similar childhood defeats of mine. Nearly daily my heart breaks for him because in his struggles I see my own. It's funny how children can fill you with so much happiness combined with overwhelming worry all at once. I wish that someone had sat me down when I was pregnant with Andrew to tell me all of this.

I will never forget a conversation I had with Aaron's Uncle the week before my wedding. Very matter of factly, he laid out what he thought it meant to be married. He told me that Aaron and I would have the greatest moments of our lives together but folded inside that happiness would be anger, resentment, and sadness. That was okay he assured me. "Marriage is no cake walk but it's worth it!" Uncle Rick told me.

His words have stuck with me.  During those moments when Aaron and I have bitter arguments, I often remember that marriage isn't perfect. I have to love my Husband, my kids, and my life, flaws and all.

Through the years I have learned to cherish the flaws of my family, sometimes even more than our moments of brilliance. Often, It's the flaws that make us beautiful.

So today, while the kids and I explored Julian, laughing, and smiling with the occasional cross word or a whine here and there, I remembered that perfect isn’t interesting or the least bit real and I love that about us.  

Mexico

We spent our labor day in Mexico.
When I have time I will write an extensive blog about our visit. For now I will simply post a couple of photos from the trip:

A San Diego Summer

Tiny rockstar

Earlier I mentioned that I bought Amelia a guitar. I had no idea just how crazed she would become over a plastic toy. Home girl is obsessed. When we drove to Mission Beach to pick up the boys from Jr. Lifegaurds she brought it with. Get this—she also brought a bagful of costume changes. Yes, you read that correctly, my 5-year-old daughter thinks she is a rock star.

On the 20-minute car ride she went through three costume changes. First it was a Hello Kitty shirt with silver rhinestones that she called “her real rocker look”, second was a pink floral number that she called her “pretty princess rocker look”, and lastly there was her purple hippie tank that was her “rock out costume.”

After the boys got into the car, she announced that when we got home she was going to roller-skate while playing her guitar so she could be a roller-rocker, but first she needed a costume change.

My daughter is awesome.

Shart face

I overheard the following conversation between Andrew and Jacob while they were putting together a Lego spaceship in the living room,


Jacob: "Number 4 is diarrhea."

Andrew:"No, #3 is Diarrhea! There aren't 4 different levels of pooing!"

Jacob: "It goes like this , #1 pee, #2 poo, #3 Sharts, #4 diarrhea."

Andrew:"What does shart mean?"

Jacob:" A poo fart."

Andrew: "Oh, those are the worst! I had to throw my underwear away in the bathroom at school once because of one of those."


Welcome to my sometimes disgusting world of raising boys!

A bunch of nerds

The kids have spirit week at school Monday-Thursday in celebration of the school's basketball teams.  Today was nerd day, tomorrow is hippie/disco day, followed by wacky day, and lastly school spirit day.  My kids get super into it which I find adorable.

P.S. I started school today.  My courses are dismal!  Spanish and Algebra, blech!

Around the corner fudge is made

I nicknamed the family I carpool with the perfects after our first week of driving one another's children to and from school. They are a nice family, a really nice family, one could even say a close to perfect family. I adore them and especially love their three kids. But, they are the kind of family that could put any other family to shame. Sometimes after a really terrible day when my children have behaved like animals, the perfect children and their perfect manners will make me feel like a worthless waste of parenting space. Especially when their daughter whips out her assignment notebook and proceeds to get a jump start on her homework in MY CAR on the WAY HOME FROM SCHOOL. What kind of child does that?

The Perfects were guests at Amelia's 5th Birthday Party. When my soon to be sister-in-law decided to bring two bottles of wine to the party and drink most of them on her own (again, who does that!), what parent do you think she decided to carry on a slurred conversation with? Mrs. Perfect of course! Talk about humilating!

The perfects have a 7 year old son who loves Jacob. He thinks Jacob is the coolest kid that has ever walked the earth. He wants to look like him, dress like him, and basically be the younger version of Jake. Since there are no other boys in Jake's grade to play with, him and perfect boy child have become really close this year. They adore each other. It's really sweet.

Lately I have noticed that perfect boy child has been acting a little less than perfect. Oh he puts it on thick for his mom, but around Jacob he is a crazy child. Yesterday on the car ride home he discussed the color and consistency of his poop for nearly a half an hour.  The day before that, he shouted "you know what I like to do with knives, besides killing things" to which I had to interrupt him and ask if his mom would approve of him talking about killing things with knives. "Probably not he told me."

"Then perhaps you shouldn't talk that way in my car." I told him

Today while dropping the boys off I was approached by Mrs. Perfect. Whenever she approaches me with an overly eunthusistic smile I know that my children have done something.

"It seems Jacob has taught my son a song." she tells me

"Oh," I say quickly thinking of all the off color songs Jake knows and wondering which one it could be. I panic remembering the song Aaron's buddy Frank took upon himself to teach my boys on a recent surf trip. Frank has the mentality of a 10 year old and my kids adore him.

"Every boy six and up needs to know it!" Frank argued

The worst part is that I had sung the very same song as a kid and thought it was madly hysterically. The gross lyrics are as followed, which believe me are much worse once you add the hand gestures that go along with it:

"Milk,Milk,Lemon-aid, around the corner fudge is made, stick your finger up the hole out comes tootsie roll." The singer points to various private parts of the body. It is disgusting. The boys smiled a toothy smile while singing it for me. I made it known that they were to never sing that song again.

While Mrs.Perfect is standing in front of me arms folded I consider what I should say to her about the song. Do I tell her that a grown man taught it to the boys and  that it has been around for generations. that I, myself, as a little person, once sang the same song through fits of giggles?

"Can you tell me what the song says?" I ask."

On key perfect boy belts out,

"I hate you, you hate me
Let's get together and kill Barney
Shot him with a sniper
now he's dead
Aren't you glad that Barney's dead."

I stifle a Chuckle while realizing how immature I am.  While perfect boy sings he is smiling as if for the first time in his life he is free. Clearly the Barney song will be resung over and over out of ear shot from his mom.

His mom interrupts him when he continues to belt out more lyrics. She is disgusted. It's at that moment that I realize how huge of a bullet I have just dodged. Can you imagine what she would of thought about the other song? There would have been a meeting with the principal, a school psychologists called, it would not have been good. It's moments like these that I think my kids are corrupting her kids in the worst way and then I think that maybe it is good for them , maybe it's good for both of our families. Maybe in some weird way we need each other to balance the other out, the perfects an the imperfects learning from each other.

When I tell perfect mom that all the kids at school know that song she is even more outraged. The truth is that song is a childhood classic. At the kids old school I would hear sticky faced little people belt it out on the playground. Even now at their tiny little school I have heard a group of girls singing it through tears of joy.

"Who is teaching this to them!?" she wants to know. I have a feeling names will be written down and handed over to the school's principal.

I shrug. "Jake learned it from Andrew, who learned it from a kid, who learned it form another kid. It's a popular song for their age range. He'll outgrow it."  I tell her. I promise to discuss the situation with Jake and assure her that no other songs will be shared. She thinks I am being flippant, I can tell by the way her lips are pursed.  She doesn't seems satisfied.

"I thought Jake taught him a song that is much worse then that." I tell her.

She raises an eyebrow. I shouldn't have said that. Who knows maybe she'll put an end to this whole carpool thing.

Our Weekend in pictures

Friday afternoon Amelia and I ate at Bay Park Fish Market because it is sooo good. Amelia ordered a lemon-aid almost as big as her torso along with cheese quesadillas (boring) while I opted for an eel roll. The bathroom at this place is amazing. I should've taken a photo.

Saturday we all went on a 14 mile bike ride like the one I wrote about here, only it wasn't as terrible as I remembered it being back then.  I must've been disgustingly lazy in my early twenties.

 

Afterward we ate our weight in poorly put together pizza from luigis (my family thinks it's good but they did not grow up in chicago therefore they are clueless as to what good pizza really is)

 

On Sunday (today)we drove around looking at the four bedroom homes that are in our price range followed by a family trip to Costco where for once in his life Aaron did not buy anything insane in bulk size.  We lazily spent the rest of the day at home drving each other insane. The end!