Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Nine

Nine
Andrew's birthday letter 9



Andrew,

You have turned nine years old. I feel like the next time I blink you will be as old as I am. This has been an extremely tough year for you. You have had to deal with bullies at school and the most insane amount of homework that I have seen placed upon a 3rd grader.

I have questioned my ability to parent you on a daily basis. Sometimes I feel like I am failing you. It seems like there are all these things I should be saying and doing to nature and love you better but I can't seem to get it right. Mostly I feel like I am out of my league and so not equipped to parent a little man. That's what you are now, a little man.

You have become an independent thinker who feels more then I ever felt at nine. You're a leader and nothing close to being a follower. For nine you are way beyond your years.

I hope that I am doing things right. I love you so much that it literally hurts at times. Every time I pick you up from school and you are sad from something that happened during the day it breaks my hurt. I hate to see you sad. I think it is going to have to be a feeling that I will have to live with. Growing up is a messy affair filled with all of sorts of moments of happiness and sadness.

I have realized this year that I cannot protect you from the world. I naively thought that I could shield you from all things ugly but it's proved impossible. No matter how hard I try you will get hurt.

I have also learned that you are resilient and strong. You are one tough little guy. I have had to let go of you a little bit to let you be that person that you are going to become. You have realized this year that I am flawed. I have fallen from the mommy pedestal you once held me on. That's been hard for me but it needed to happen. It's all part of growing up. It is fun seeing your personality shift and shape. I think you're fantastic. I am proud of the boy your becoming! I am looking forward to seeing what this year holds for you.

Love,

Mom

Pictures through the years:

8 months old

First Halloween

Andrew 13 months old, We have the same facial expressions

Andrew, 2 years old

3 years old

age 4

First time you rode a two wheeler

First day of kindergarten age 5

With your oldest friends and brother

Age 6

Age 7

Age 8

Age 9

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